24 March 2007

Unexcusable Stupidities of America #3: "San Jose: Home of the Most Untalented Music"

U.S.A. (Unexcusable Stupidities of America)
Stupidity #3 - "San Jose: Home of the Most Untalented Music Ever!"
Originally written: 1 December 2006
Updated: today, as the original version I accidentally mistyped as "#2" which I wrote back in July!!!

It's bad enough that my hometown of San Jose and its vicinity must be laden with all sorts of low-life citizens who plague the city. Some of those citizens decided to take up careers in music. The earliest SJ low-life butt-clown who took up a musical career was Frank Feranna, Jr., which most rock fans (except me!) associate as Nikki Sixx, bassist of fake glam-metal band Motley Crue. Then, did you know that Smash Mouth, the band that created the most overrated, overplayed rock song ever, "All Star", come from San Jose?? Yikes. Plus, ever tuned locally to 104.9 (before it became spanish) or 105.3 or 107.7 and heard, "back off, I'll take you on, headstrong, i'll take on anyone, i know that you are wrong"? Well, that band was Trapt, from Los Gatos in the vicinity. And now, guess what, we've got more untalented hack "musicians" who are coming to play in San Jose. I found out about two of them from articles in the thursday edition of the san jose mercury news, and so here they are.

The All-American Rejects
"Hardcore rockers earn All-American status" ~ Shay Quillen
The All-American Rejects were a pop-punkrock band formed in Stillwater, Oklahoma, in 2001. Their self titled 2002 debut album got them a hit single, "Swing, Swing", which I just downright dislike. Until their followup 2005 CD Move Along, they were considered a one-hit wonder. In late 2004, I borrowed their self-titled CD from the library, and I didn't like it. When "Dirty Little Secret" began getting overplayed on radio and Myspace, I became even more hateful toward the band. Things got worse when I saw the video for "Move Along" on KTSF. When I read the article on the SJMN and noticed Quillen labeled these guys "hardcore", I was downright furious. Look, you can logiclaly label AAR hardcore if you read this:

"It's an odd mix: [drummer Chris] Gaylor and [vocalist Mike] Kennerty still play hard-core punk in a side project called These Enzymes." Hmm, that's what I call hardcore! So, do NOT listen to the Mercury News whne they say AAR are hardcore! AAR are only ripoffs of Good Charlotte/Simple Plan/New Found Glory/every other queer pop punk band out there. And these morons are performing with Motion City Soundtrack, The Format, and Boys Like Girls at the Event Centre at San Jose State University this Monday night. Hmm, just got off iTunes, those other bands are also untalent butt-holes like AAR, that's why they get to play with them.

Panic! at the Disco
"Stars Straight Out of High School" ~ Yoshi Kato
I'm not giving out the background of these untalented butt-holes, whose debut album A Fever You Can't Sweat Out is basically an experience as says in the title. I first heard this band's music in July on Live 105 (KITS-FM 105.3) with "The Only Difference...", and I was dissatisfied. Few months later, "I Write Sins Not Tragedies" hit MTV and radio, and that song sucked balls! I went on iTunes to hear the rest of the CD, and now I realised that PATD were yet another crappy Fallout Boy/emo ripoff to screw up our youth! And then, thye're coming to SJ at the HP Pavilion this Tuesday night, with anotehr untalented butt band, Cobra Starship, and a somehow listenabl band, Jack's Mannequin. I'm listening to their album, Everything in Transit, in iTunes now, and I'm just so sad that this talented band would tour with some untalented chili eaters.

Please, support good punk rock and look for these good punk CD's:
- Henry ~ These Enzymes
- Loud, Fast Ramones: Their Toughest Hits ~ The Ramones
- Dookie ~ Green Day
- Everything in Transit ~ Jack's Mannequin

Justin Timberlake
I first heard that he was coming to San Jose back around Veterans Day, his concert on 11 January 2007 in HP Pavilion was sponsored by garbage music station Wild 94.9, which I've first liked in 1998 and trashed in September of this very year. Gosh, JT is so bad that he makes the All-American Rejects sound talented! JT has been a joke since his entry into the music industry with the boy band N'Sync in 1998, 'til their breakup following three instantly forgettable albums in 2002. You thought he was gone for good? EEHH! His solo CD Justified sounded more UN-justified when its release in 2003, when news with his love with another untalented c_nt named Britney Spears spread ad naseum across the country.

By the summer of 2004, we all forgot about Justified and JT-Britney, as they broke up from their engagement. Two years later...

"I'm bringing sexy back, yup, them motherf__kers don't know how to act..."

When I first heard "Sexyback" on the radio in August, I said, "Oh sh*t, JT is back to haunt us all again!" That was one reason I quit listening to wild 94.9, it plays too much BS music like "Sexyback". And now he's gonna come to San Jose, which we should all be boycotting. This leads to my other point

Where have all the talented bands gone?
I mean, Disturbed came to Mountain View back in winter 2005-spring 2006 I believe, not too far away from where I live! And now, with untalented butt-holes All-American Rejects, Panic at the Disco, and Justin Timberlake coming to town, I shall announce also that perhaps the programme directors of the major music venues of San Jose are probably drunk butt-holes too, or the tour managers of the good bands are too lazy, or both, explaining why I could not find any TALENTED bands coming to the South Bay anytime soon. Look at the tour page on GNR's official site! Their last Bay Area stop for the Chinese Democracy tour is 15 December in Oakland! THey already played SF back in the weekend of 15-16 September, and I'm not happy that whoever f*gg*t was scheduling the Chinese Democracy tour didn't include San Jose, who's already got all the untalented music coming to town! Hmm, let's find other talented bands who are currently active in the music scene. Trivium...last played in Bay 27 October in San Francisco, sponsored by 107.7 the Bone. Killswitch Engage - bummer, no Bay shows! Hmm, since I'm forcusing on bands coming to San Jose, i'll just go on hppsj.com, the official site of the hp pavilion, to look up what's coming up. Tommorrow, opera singer Andre Rieu comes to town, and evne though I could care less for opera, I'd rather listen to that than pop punk. In February 2007, Disney on Ice takes over. Most other events are the San Jose Sharks. Then 10 March 2007, is Christina Aguilera, all of her albums are unoriginal forgettable jokes! 28 March 2007: Josh Groban, who's music is boring, but better & more intelligent than Justin Timbleake or Aguilera or Panic! The Event Centre in SJSU is mostly SJSU Basketball games, their oly music is monday w/all american rejects. What other fav music? Hmm, Jay-Z, no Kingdom Come tour yet. Neither did Diddy. Darn, I missed the Who's SJ date from 8 November! So with Lacuna Coil, but they were in Santa Cruz in 30 November! What about Nas, whose song "Hip-Hop is Dead" I'm now hearing on KMEL! Hmm, he kicks it off in New York and Philly in the weekend of 22-23 December...more dates TBD...Hmm, thinking thinking, so overall...here's our overall conclusion...

SAN JOSE DOESN"T REALLY GET ANY TALENTED MUSIC TO COME TO TOWN, WHILE SAN FRANCISCO/OAKLAND/EVERYWHERE ELSE GETS TO, OR THE BANDS SKIP THE BAY! WAHH!!

Well what can you do about it? Convince the organisers of HP Pavilion and Event Centre that their musicians coming to town suck and you want better music! How? Request them on local radio! Write letters to the bands requesting a stop to the South Bay! Do whatever it takes to get a good band to come to San Jose, who's already got too much bad music around here! If you wanna request song on radio: here's some radio station numbers
KMEL 106.1 (hip-hop/R&B) 1-800-955-KMEL (5635)
KSAN 107.7 "The Bone" (hard rock) 1-888-303-BONE (2663)
KITS 105.3 "Live 105" (alternative/modern rock) 1-800-696-LIVE (5483)
Or, write to the HP Pavilion or Event Centre. Well, I've gotta run, as I'll go headbang to the Metalzone on 107.7 the Bone now!

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